Because the name 'Countries that we forcibly took over and then raped, murdered and pillaged' is a tad too controversial, the British instead refer to them as the Commonwealth of Nations and at the moment number 52 but we could well be adding another to the list as the former colony called the United States of America mull over coming under our blood stained banner.
It certainly fits into the criteria of a previous part of the British Empire now independent like so many in Africa, Asia and Australasia so it would only be a matter of blowing the dust off the book which has been unopened since 1776 and saying 'Howdy and Yee Haw'.
The current American President, Donald Trump, is said to be enthusiastic about a return to the bosom of the Old Country and as we are on our uppers, the Government think it would be an excellant move to drive up trade links so everyone's a winner although it may not go down so well with the gun clinging Good Ole Boys drinking Whiskey and Rye at the levee's who may not be quite so keen
to bring the monarchy back into their Republic.
The criteria is that they recognise the Queen as the head of the Commonwealth and accept and comply with racial equality, World Peace, liberty, human rights and free trade and conduct all Commonwealth communications in English while the British are the sole decision makers on whether these conditions are being met and can boot out anyone who they consider in breech.
Looking at the conditions, America may want to wait until the Trump has left office because racial equality and World Peace could be a sticking point and then it's welcome back America, help us move her majesty's Throne into the Oval Office, rip up that Independence thingy and let's discuss what the hell you have been doing for the past 241 years and those mind-numbing, bat crazy gun laws you have.