Tuesday, 26 May 2020

Cummings But Not Going's

I'm not sure it comes with the endorsement of Specsavers but Dominic Cummings has come up with  great new way to test your eyesight if you are unsure if you are fit to drive, pack your wife and 4 year-old child into a car and take a 70 mile round trip, if you make it back alive you are deemed fit, wrap your car around a tree or take out several pedestrians and you can assume you are not quite ready to get behind the wheel.  
Boris Johnson said that Coronavirus does make your eyes 'go weird' and revealed that he has begun wearing glasses for the 'first time in years' since recovering from the virus, but it must do weird things to the memory also because he previously that he needs glasses but tries not to wear them as a 'point of machismo'.
If driving 270 miles while ill and then an additional 40 miles to a local beauty spot on your wife's birthday in the middle of a lock-down is a tad too risky for you could always go old school and visit an optician, most of them have remained open or there are online tests and most buildings now come with things called Windows which enable a person inside to look out of at things at various distances to judge if they are blurry or out of focus.
I guess Cummings is now kicking himself that he went through the whole problem of driving all that way when he could have just found out if his eyesight was failing that didn't involve Barnard Castle or driving a tonne of metal at least 30mph through streets for 70 miles with his loved ones lives depending on him being able to see properly or not.
Some people have suggested another reason why his eyesight is so bad and although i have heard that this can have an effect on men's eyesight, we will never find out and can only hope that he will know next time.

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