I don't think i have ever seen a bear, don't think i have even seen one in a zoo but as far as my understanding is if i was to bump into one it would more than likely rip off my limbs, hit me over the head with the soggy end and then eat me for tea as some kind of Lucy salad.In short, bears are not the sort of animal you would want to cross so with the adverts hitting the screens of the new Paddington movie, i wonder how did they get such a good image?
Off the top of my head, including Paddington, i can name Rupert Bear, Winnie the Pooh, Biffo the Bear, Yogi and Boo Boo, Fozzie Bear, Sooty, Pom Bear, Baloo and Bungle from Rainbow which are all kind hearted bears.
Then there are teddy bears with cute button noses and shiny glass eyes but no sign of the claws that with a flick would send your intestines heading southwards onto your shoes.
Why then, when there are so many other cuter animals around, was it bears chosen to steal our pic-a-nic baskets and sing cheery songs with Rod, Jane and Freddy?
Why not seals, rabbits or squirrels which are much more cuddly and a lot less liable to use your thigh bone to pick it's teeth?
Remember that when Paddington comes to a theatre near you, he may look cute with his battered suitcase and marmalade sandwiches but given the chance he would be ripping out your windpipe and gnawing on your skull before you could say 'Darkest Peru'.
2 comments:
I've had interactions with them in Utah, Colorado, and Texas. They are generally not aggressive. Are very curious. Very smart. And very scary.
The native Americans supposedly said "a pine needle falls in the forest. The hawk sees it, the deer heard it, and the bear smells it."
Q
I recommend the Werner Herzog doco 'Grizzly Man', if you haven't seen it. Confirms that bears are indeed beautiful creatures, but incredibly dangerous.
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