The last time anyone saw me i was slipping off the side of an American battleship with several holes in my head but while i admit that was a personal low-point, i didn't do too bad, i was the World's most famous man at one point.When i think about it, and not trying to steal any thunder from John Lennon, i was probably more famous than that other middle eastern man with a beard who inspired millions and was killed by those occupying his lands, only with more TV cameras.
Regarding the Holy Jihad against the infidel west, it did kind of lose it's edge slightly, i was all for the murder and mayhem at first but it isn't much fun being the World's most famous man and spending my time stuck in a small cave with only Al Zawahiri for company, especially after beans for tea, and that man ate a lot of beans.
Things got to a point that i was searching through the Koran to see if there is some Sharia law loophole that means i could force him to sit outside but despite there being a rule for pretty much everything else, there was not one for dealing with excessive flatulence.
Although it was widely thought that i hated all things Western, us Al Queada types did have a lot of time for some American actors, i especially liked Mel Gibson and i asked him personally to appear in my next video release entitled "Those Fecking Jews" but we failed to agree on a price. Shame really because i felt we had a real connection.
Despite being dead, i do try my best to keep up with what is going on in the Great and Little Satan and with my reputation i am of course attracted to the religious right in both nations although i don't think any of the current leaders could come close to what Bush and i shared, sending other people to a pointless death.
On the whole i had a few good years but i wish we had a few more make up artists coming over to our side, looking back on those video's i really could have done with a someone giving me a beard trim and dye.
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