My story begins in a Chinese laundry, i stole some clothes and got reported to the authorities but i escaped arrest by fleeing town to Bonita where i got into a disagreement with a man and he went for his gun, i went for mine but i was quicker and blasted his head into skull-and-brains confetti so with my first killing under my belt, i was back on the run from the law.
I was always happy for a free exchange of bullets even if the guns we used were hopeless, those quick-draws at high noon that seemed to happen every other day was more two dudes just stood across from one another with their guns out, aiming and firing until someone got lucky on the fifth or sixth shot and someone else was dead.
There was some real rootin-tootin tough varmints around at that time of the Wild West. There was one guy i got into a gun fight with and i shot him in the groin but he kept shooting until his rifle ran out of bullets and then he charged me and took his empty rifle and clubbed the blazing pigshit out of me and i decided it was way too early in the day for any more of this crap and left him to bleed to death from his dick wound.
The name 'The Kid' came about when i joined the outlaw gang 'The Lincoln County Regulators' as i was the youngest of that bunch of the shit kickinest gang the Wild West ever saw although i was more about the horse rustling and killing than doing what most outlaws did and make their fortunes from robbing trains or banks that had slightly less security than one of your modern day newspaper stands.
All was sweet until i killed the Lincoln County Sheriff William Brady and was arrested and put on trial for murder which led to me being sentenced to hang because shooting me in broad daylight on a main street was a bit too obvious but that was their mistake because i escaped due to the morons using manacles which were too big so i slipped them off, shot the deputy and stole a horse and fled to New Mexico but in an ironic twist my horse got nicked by Apaches and i had to walk most of the way.
Somehow Sheriff Pat Garrett heard that i was staying at a friends house in Fort Sumner and waited for me to come home and Garrett shot me in the heart but i lived and died like a proper outlaw, i worked hard, killed lots of men, didn't shower and died in my boots.
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