It's Her Royal Majesty's Queen Elizabeth 2 Queen of the United Kingdom, Canada, Australia and the other countries where we knocked off the natives 90th birthday today. Happy Birthday Ma'am.
The common consensus seems to be that she looks good for an 90 year old and i admit that she does look particularly peachy and healthy although she does wear some strikingly silly hats which we could kindly put down to her failing eyesight.
The Royals do tend to live long and healthy lives, much to the annoyance of Prince Charles, but i know the Royal secret to living to a fair old age and looking a picture of health in your 90s, do very little.
That's the Royals secret. They do nothing whatsoever. Wave at the plebs dutifully lining the streets every now and then and remember to feed the corgi's while having your every whim seen to by an army of maids and butlers, but that's it.
Once a year she has to drag herself in front of a TV camera at Christmas and waffle about her Commonwealth and what a good year it's been for her family and then she has the other 364 days, 23 hours and 45 minutes free to flounce off around the World and read about her Grandchildren getting drunk or jetting off on another holiday somewhere.
So it's Happy Birthday Lizzie, I'm sure you will have many more. Now get a proper job and stop taking us for tens of millions each year.
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